Ok so I have had a special fondness for this poster for years. It's not because her name is Rosie (well, ok, fine, that does have something to do with it...) But because it personifies my outlook on life. I'm want to roll up my sleeves and do the hard things I need to do. I recall 2 weeks ago talking to Sis. Jensen about having babies and she said "I tell the sisters at church not to bring me any meals till the 3rd week after I've had a baby. The 3rd week is the hardest."
This was my eye opener. I realized that even though I had just had a baby last year I had forgotten this simple and yet important detail. Right then she was sleeping all the time and I was doing ok.
Since then many MANY things have happened to me (most I won't even mention) to let's say 'make me feel less than adequate'. I went to the Service's family home evening last night with a heavy heart that can't really be expressed. The lesson was on "Seeing God's hand in your life everyday."
I really had to sit there and think... in the days that I was most brought down there was special moments I had totally ignored. ...a timely phone call from my sister, a humorous moment, sweet words from my husband....and on and on.
God was with me all along telling me I didn't need to be perfect but I did need to press on.
Why do get down down on myself?
Sage said to me: "When you have a large family, you are under the microscope."
-No Joke! I'd better do it right or it just proves to the world that big families are not desirable or not good for children. Every time I mess up I feel it!! I'll forget all about all the days I've done everything right. I feel the eyes of the world wondering if I'm just a "baby collector" rather than a woman who deeply loves each of her beautiful, unique children and gives all she has to rear each one carefully according to their needs. It's like I have something to prove to everyone. I'm starting to feel my sense of humor leave and now I'm taking my mistakes WAY too seriously. Every time some appliance breaks down in the house I want to break down too!
So, It's time for me to be Rosie the Riveter again. But this time I'm rolling up my sleeves to laugh with my husband, to snuggle my beautiful children, to write when they are asleep, play with them when they are awake, to just breathe, and do all those things that make me feel like a happy mom and KNOCK OUT all the over achieving crap that lures me away from the needs of my little peeps! This is not my year to be a PTO mom or soccer 'team mom', School 'room mom', the Photoshop graphic design mom, the snazzy photographer mom, the preschool teaching mom or even the Uber Cub Scouting mom.
Grant will be in a real preschool in a month or 2, Zack has his cub scout stuff WAY and I mean -W-A-Y- ahead and everything else will work itself out.
Well nap time is up so I've got to go. Please leave me a note about your thoughts on all of this. I'm interested on how to better manage my time and also feel like an accomplished yet under stressed Mommy.
;-)
9 comments:
I think the thing that I try to do is when my son comes up to me and asks me for some of my time, like to read a book or play with his choo choo, even if I don't want to and am really busy I try to do it for at least 5 minutes.
Sounds to me you are already doing a great job and you figured out what will be better for your family!
i feel that with just 2 kids that i should do everything better because i have a small family and i should have more time/patience/energy...
i think we do it to ourselves!
btw-you are an awesome mom! and i think that heavenly father gives anyone who marries into the service family bonus points just for getting involved in these crazies...
I second that BA... real wisdom!!! I thought about you all day... happy to read that you are still able to post. I love you ROSIE!!!
Its a strange coincidence that I brought up Rosie the Riveter in a choir class today, and you blogged about today also. Weird!
love you ALL! :) your stronger then me I couldn't do 5 kids!
I love this post! I am entering week 3 and feeling like maybe I should have stopped at three kids! but I know that I was supposed to have these five and I really wouldn't go back and change my mind. I need to press forward and just be the mom! not a mom and... Becase right now just mom to my 5 beauties is the most important! Thanks :)
Actually poster Rosie looks like she's going to punch someone's light's out that gives her any grief!
All of us women in the church feel we should be doing better with what we have been handed. We compare ourselves with others and we don't see the full picture.
A friend once told me about how she admired her RS President who had a family and ran a business full-time and this and that. Turns out she hired a nanny to take care of the children.
No one knows you are hitting your target unless you tell them what the target was.
There's an Indonesian rice that has to be burnt in the cooking as part of the dish. So a wise cook said, if you ever burn the rice tell people it's supposed to be that way.
Your true friends love you for the special person you are so who cares about the losers who don't see you as we do!
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